remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
he fucked my hip out of place.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
