The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
