Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
