ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
My ATM looks so different sober.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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