I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
my sisters under your porch take her home
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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