I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
