You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
