He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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