I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Randomize
