Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
