i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
