$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Randomize
