I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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