lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
FUCK WHALES
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Randomize
