Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
