Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
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