I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
