so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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