what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
