Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
she looked like the before picture.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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