I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
