Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I believe in your delicious
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Randomize
