You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize
