You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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