Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
