You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
