shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
