you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Randomize
