Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
