mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
