He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Randomize
