I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Randomize
