Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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