that's an acceptable place to lick
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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