the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
ugly people sure do ruin things
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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