These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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