im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
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