I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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