I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
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