but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Randomize
