U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
