wrigley field is MILF paradise
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
thus making me awesome and them whores
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Randomize
