he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
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