So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Randomize
