I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
