i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
