yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Randomize
