I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
