We should be called the Road Head Warriors
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
