chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
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