5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize